One of the easiest ways to hear amusing things is to be an Uber driver. Many people share their most private conversations with complete strangers while they are being driven around, and the drivers are forced to listen to it.
You will probably find that your day is not as bad as you thought it was when you overhear conversations while driving an Uber. Look at what these people posted about the funniest conversations these Uber drivers overheard.
Knows Only a Little Spanish
This passenger should have believed the driver when they said they only know a little Spanish.
In Spanish, the passenger asked the driver, “What is your name?” The driver responded, “Good.”
Travel More Often In Uber
You should always travel with Uber Pool. Who knows, someone may give you a gift if you tell that person that their jewelry is nice.
This is what happened when one passenger told the other one she loves her earrings.
She was handed the jewelry, as the gifter told her that she did not want to be too attached to material things.
Ruin the Chances
One person asked their Uber driver if they could put a sheet cake in the trunk so that it would be deliberately ruined when arriving at their destination.
The reason? She didn’t want to be asked to bake cakes by others, so a ruined cake would reduce the chances of getting asked for similar favors in the future.
Messaged the Wrong Number
A woman told the Uber driver and fellow passengers that she wanted to break up with Jeff last night when she was drunk.
Unfortunately for her, she wrote the breakup message in the comments section of the Uber that brought her home last night.
Solve the Puzzle
An Uber driver told a passenger that they would give them 5 stars if they could solve a Rubik’s cube.
He then told the passenger that they would still get 5 stars if they couldn’t solve it, but he would judge them for not solving it.
Try To Impress Them
This guy told other passengers that he always goes on a first date in an Uber to show his date that he is fancy.
That backfired on him when another passenger replied that she would just take one look at his shoes and think otherwise.
She Can Feel It
A girl ordered an Uber but suddenly changed her mind and canceled the ride when she opened the door.
Apparently, someone who was already inside the vehicle had a bad aura that she felt as soon as she opened the door.
First, Some Coffee Please
A female passenger wanted to share poetry with a fellow passenger who, she said, had a welcoming personality.
However, the other passenger was not interested and told her that she hadn’t had a cup of coffee yet and wasn’t ready face this kind of thing.
Do Not Annex Our Culture
One passenger was talking about an influencer and complained about them posting about Mondays while not even having a job.
Another customer replied that those influencers are taking over their culture, and they feel it is not right.
Please, No More Watercolors
This woman was complaining over the phone about getting ugly watercolors that she didn’t want.
She realized then that the others may think she was complaining about her child, so she turned to them and said it was her boyfriend she was talking about.
Want Some Drama?
A passenger asked others in the Uber if they wanted quiet or fun, because she wanted to call her ex and yell at him.
At least she asked them what they wanted before she decided to cause drama in the vehicle.
Listen To Advice
After complaining the whole ride about her boyfriend not texting, and then asking the others for advice, she exclaimed, “He texted!”
Another passenger replied that she could have at least pretended to listen to the advice they gave her.
No Trust
This driver overheard a person request that their Uber buddy share their estimated time of arrival but was asked why they couldn’t just send a text.
The unimpressed passenger who didn’t want to share his time of arrival said, “I saw you lying in bed texting ‘on my way’, so no, you lost that privilege.”
Who Did It?
This guy asked fellow passengers if any of them just tried to Airdrop him a picture of a bunny with a backpack on.
He heard a very dry “yes” from the back seat of the vehicle, and that was all he got.
No Facetime Permission
One guy asked the other if he minded that he Facetime his girlfriend, Carly, while riding.
The other person replied that he would rather show his mom his browser history than listen to them calling each other ‘babe’ for half an hour.
Need Some Quiet
The drunk girl told the rest of the passengers that she was going to be silent during the drive.
Her excuse was that she needed to close all the apps in her brain, which would apparently take some time.
Misusing Him
This woman told someone else that she did not want to date a guy, but she likes having him around for UberEats and movies.
Then she surprisingly answered that he worked for the Foodzone, a food retail marketing company.
Keep It Quiet
One friend was whispering in the backseat to the other when the other one asked why she was whispering – it was just them in the car.
Her reply was that she didn’t want the driver to know she has a crush on her therapist… or should she ask the driver for advice?
What Do You Look Like?
The driver asked a passenger over the speakerphone what he looks like because he could not see him in the dark.
The passenger replied that he was tall and wearing a green shirt and that he kind of looks like a tree.
Let Me Out
A guy asked his girlfriend what she wanted, and she replied that she didn’t really know what they were doing.
One of the other passengers replied with a distressed “Oh no, let me get out of here, what was he thinking?”
Do Not Leave Her Here
On his way out of town, a passenger was having a conversation with his mom after what seemed like a breakup with his girlfriend.
Then his mother shouted at him that he can not leave his girlfriend of 3 years here eating crackers in her bathtub.
Part the Red Sea
A girl was throwing a tantrum in the Uber, saying that she wants her mojito and the crowd in her way better part like the Red Sea.
The driver replied dryly that his name was Moses, so maybe he could help with that.
Not That Well
The driver asked the passenger how his night was going, and he answered that it was not going that well for him.
His reason – he forgot what a penguin was called and named it the wobbly cold thing on a first date.
Just Me and the Plants
Making small talk is not always easy while riding in an Uber, like when this passenger asked another how her husband, children, and dogs were doing.
The other passenger replied that she was alone, just her and her house plants, no one else.
Just Pretend
A woman who saw her ex and his fiancé standing nearby as she got out of the Uber did not want to look lonely or sad.
She asked the guys in the vehicle for one of them to shout that he would see her tonight as the car drove away.
First-Time Uber
This guy asked a woman what she did for a living, and she told him that she is a mom.
“Good, I love moms” was his reply, and then he said that he was going to say that his mom is also a mom. He then apologized for being a first-time Uber rider.
You Smell Bad
One guy asked the other if he used natural deodorant, and the other guy replied, “Yes, why?”
The first guy replied that he felt it was important to inform the other guy that his deodorant did not work.
For Your Information
While waiting for his Uber, one guy said that he would rather use Uber instead of driving himself because of the hate mail.
Another person answered dryly that those are called parking tickets. He just thought he should know.
Not an Airplane
The Uber driver told a guy to put on his seatbelt before he started driving, and the passenger said he hoped there was no turbulence.
The driver simply informed the guy that this is a car, not a plane.
Any Animal Can Be
A passenger asked a girl with a cat whether the cute cat was an emotional support animal.
Her reply was no, but any animal could be an emotional support animal if you are screwed up enough.
Sorry For Being Annoying
A drunk person driving in an Uber apologized for being annoying, because he was not sober enough to know it.
He went on and said that he was also so drunk that he could not talk too much, so he just wanted to say sorry for that.
I’m Right Here
When these four guys entered the Uber after saying their goodbyes to a bunch of friends, one guy said he was glad that Luke went home.
To his surprise, Luke answered from the back seat, “Hey, I’m right here.”
No More Emergency
A guy got into an Uber and needed to go to the ER. However, he sneezed on the way there and said that he just sneezed out the Lego.
The passenger told the driver that there was no longer an emergency and that he wanted to go to a new destination.
Can Not Remember
When a woman was asked about the date she was on, she replied that she played a drinking game where she took a drink every time he mentioned his podcast.
He talked about it so much that she could not remember a lot about the date or everything else.
Change Of Looks
When some told this person they looked great, she replied that a girl in their Uber Pool braided her hair and sprayed it with rose water.
The person also said that the girl looked like a queen now. Aw, that’s sweet.
A Group Chat
A person from a small town was asked by another person from New York what it was like growing up in a small town.
Their reply was that it feels like being part of a group chat that you do not want to be part of.
You Are Stuck
When one passenger tried to talk to another, this passenger replied that she was not in the mood to talk.
The first passenger replied, “Neither am I, I just wanted to let you know your hair is stuck in the door.”
Summary
You can imagine how many different things Uber drivers overhear in just one work day.
The few that we mentioned here are but a drop in the bucket of the funny conversations happening in Ubers on a daily basis.